She used to grub waterholes with a stick previously, afterwards she found waterholes by walking back and forth in the new places she went. She hit the road in order to discover this ruthless relationship of her with the waterholes.
The clues she found were in some avenues that are close to each other; she looked for something known; someone, some house, some clue… In the places of the olds, there were newbies who appropriate the places of olds just as if they had been there from the beginning.
For instance; they told “it became history” for the dark movie theater whose chairs used to dangle.
Movie theaters were not the only things that became history; apparently what we call ‘history’ hides the lost as if it had never been there.
She was lost…
If everywhere is demolished,
If reaching gets harder,
it is because you don’t look at the right place, maybe
Takes photos instead of thinking then, and ‘look for it’ in the details of photos
(an eye that looks at a coded object is imprisoned out of reality)
She put photos to in front instead of memories,
That tree which had holders on its branches in past, wasn’t ‘that tree’ anymore,
Matching past with present was deficient, what passed was not time, it was places; town passed, it was present now
She couldn’t find clues; those she knew the existence of were invisible now… there was a silence… everything slowed down… slowed down, the contact was cut
Shuddering all of a sudden, she check return ticket inside her pocket; being here was harder now than not to be here
In the return path, with the twitchy rain, her eyes couldn’t help looking at the rain drops that started to leak at the windowpane by finding its way… when that winded up uncanny ballad was ringing in her mind, as her eyes were getting heavier, she was thinking about the lost that couldn’t come back.
(Each of the ugly ducklings doesn’t turn into a swan at the end…)
Anahtar kelimeler: üç kırmızı güvercin, mudo mustafa, dans eden benlikler, cumhur, pota, muhammed, kırıcı, akvaryum, fuar, lunapark, seden, istasyon, çaycı ömer, oyuncakçı celil, banu, yöntaş, bacak çapları, ego gökhan, iştecik, binkonut, benetton aziz, ilker, bilardo, papağan, turhal, kırık ütü, yeşil, pink floyd, leda, dürümcü ali, hacı kaya
reading text in TR Θ